Jacket by Ben Sherman, sweater by Nudie, t-shirt by Muji, jeans by Lee, boots by Hunter, socks by Kapp Ahl, underwear and hat by H&M, belt by The Gap, beer belly by Founder’s Brewery, bags under the eyes by Bulleit Distilling, morgonpigg by Espresso House, deodorant by Arm & Hammer, fresh scent by Whirlpool and Via, shave by Gilette, celebrity crush by Michelle Williams, telephone by Apple, wallet by SL, marker by Sharpie, original structure by Allan and Mary Ritcher, guilty conscience and general skepticism by the Roman Catholic Church, apprehensiveness and lack of confidence by some girl in my sixth grade class who made fun of my teeth, dental work by Evel Knievel and Coca-Cola, additional accessories by Hermans Vegetarian Buffet, and the culinary traditions of Mexico, Italy and India.